(Op-Ed - I had a HUGE crush on Carol Brady - I wanted her to be my Mom and then when I grew up, I wanted to marry her - how is that for a Freudian Cliche!?)I remember when I was about 5 my Mom and Dad decided to call it quits. I think that at that time they had been married for about 16 years. Dad told me that he got married way too young. Mainly he wanted his 'girlfriend' to come to the UK with him when he volunteered to serve as on Thetis Class Boats in the Royal Navy (submarines, for those of you that do not know what I am talking about)
So, Dad bounced from Mary (my Mom) to Nancy (the Step-Monster). As an adult (who me??) he told me that he wanted a babysitter for his kids as he wanted to advance his military career. It was 1971 and I guess that was the thing to do. He also told me that VERY early in his relationship with the She-Dragon, he knew it was a mistake. (get this - Wedding Night!).
Back in late 1989, they called it quits. To quote Joe Pesci "..isn't THAT a fuckin' surprise??..". That was a messy divorce, Dad really kept his cool. I respect him for that. Personally, I don't know how I would have reacted if I were in his shoes. I guess he learned how to keep his wits about him. He told me that he is now just happy to "..have her the fuck out of my Goddamn life...:"
So, Dad is on wife number three now. Wonderful gal, I love her lots. Gail is her name. I wonder if I would be as fucked up as I am today if Dad would have married her instead of the Step-Dragon? Anyone have a T.A.R.D.I.S. that can give me a ride back to about 1970? So I can manipulate that?
So, as the story goes, I didn't really have a Mom growing up. Nancy was quick to spank, punish, demean, ridicule, neglect, make fun of and throw a shoe at me and blackened my eye. Try that shit today - see if you can count how many Government Agencies pay you a visit!
Not looking for sympathy or someone to go "...awww, poor Glen...". I just wanted to say that it took me until about 6 or 7 months ago that I never really had a mother figure. Is this why I am so fucked up? Was I born this way? Apparently , the Step-Monster used to ask me if I was 'retarded' or 'stupid' or '..you father must have picked up the wrong baby at the hospital..' . It was hurtful. I guess it is kind of a clear sign when at 7 your Step-Monster goes into the hospital to have a tumour removed and you hope she dies and doesn't come home. I was actually disappointed when I came home from school one day and saw her on the couch.
So, I guess my point is that those of you that are Moms (or Dads), what you say to your kids and what you do in front of your kids leaves a lasting impression. Cathy had good role models , I did not. I am constantly saying to her "...what should I do..?" "..what should I say..?" when the kids step out of line or get themselves in some kind of shit-house. At 42, I am still fucking clueless as to what I am doing, but there is one saying that we should all remember before saying something to our kids:
"..Do unto others as you wish them to do unto you..."
Anyway, my own Mom, Mary, died peacefully when Mikayla was about a month or two old. Sad, that I can't remember the date. It was late 2002 or early 2003. I guess I am just suppressing it.
Some time in the future, you may be wheelchair ridden, bed ridden and out of your mind with dementia, Alzheimer's or some other brain disease. You will have absolutely no control over what your kids do then.
Karma is a bitch.
Payback is a bitch.
Happy Mother's Day to all the Moms. And to my Mom - if they have WiFi in Heaven.
Peace
Glen
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